Friday Smiles 260

By now, many of you know I have a ton of photos from the History Museum I visited for Smithsonian Day.  If you want to see a link to this wonderful museum, here it is.  It's now time to share a few of these photos each Friday, along with some funny stories, quotes, verse, or jokes I found when I was cleaning my office.  By now you know I'm here for Annie's Friday Smiles.

I'll begin with the quotes, funny stories, and jokes.


The four most beautiful words in our common language: 
I told you so.
                                               ~Gore Vidal


I bought one of those tapes to teach you Spanish in your sleep. During the night, the tape skipped.  Now I can only stutter in Spanish.
                                                ~Steven Wright


How can you ever be late for anything in London? They have 
a huge clock right in the middle 
of the town.
                                                 ~Jimmy Kimmel

Q: What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
A: Pumpkin pi

At the mall, a woman's five-year-old grandson joined the other children in line waiting to sit on the Easter Bunny’s lap. When it was his turn, the little boy didn’t move; he just stared.
“Don’t you want to sit on the 
bunny’s lap?” the grandmother asked.
“No!” he shouted. “There’s 
a man in his mouth!”

Q: What goes up and never comes down?
A: Your age!


I recently decided to sell my vacuum cleaner as all it was doing was gathering dust.

250 lbs here on Earth is 94.5 lbs on Mercury.  No, I’m not fat. I’m just not on the right planet.


The best thing about the good old days is that we were neither good nor old.

If I have to choose between a husband and shoes, I choose shoes. They tend to last longer and are easier to replace.


Hillary Clinton died and went to heaven. As she stood in front of Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates, she saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. She asked, "What are all those clocks?"
Saint Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock.
Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move.
"Oh," said Hillary, "whose clock is that?"
"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved indicating that she never told a lie."
"Whose clock is that?"
"That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have only moved twice telling us that Abe only told 2 lies in his entire life."
"Where's Bill's clock?" Hillary asked.
"Bill's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan." 

and my favorite this week:

The problem with math puns is that calculus jokes are all derivative, trigonometry jokes are too graphic, algebra jokes are usually formulaic, and arithmetic jokes are pretty basic. But I guess the occasional statistics joke is an outlier.

(For those of you who don't know, I was a math and statistics major as a college undergrad)

Now let's finish the third floor at the History Museum where we will visit the last four rooms of this "typical" Wichita cottage.

This is where we left off last time.

Want to see what it looked like when I took photos the last time I was at this museum?

Now you know why I love my "new" camera.

I managed to get a bit redundant here, but at least you can make out the hallway leading to the various rooms.

I got a bit carried away taking photos of this room.  You'll see more later, too.  But for now, I was fascinated with the design of the  beautiful hardwood floors.

This has to be the ugliest wallpaper I have ever seen.

The second ugliest wallpaper is in what I believe is the parlor.

Could this be the gas and electric light fixture the History Museum talked about (see last week's entry)?

Back in the library, I was having trouble getting everything to focus.

Next I was off to the dining area.

I couldn't believe how dark this room was.

The final room was the bedroom.

There was a small writing table and a dressing area, too.  Now that you have seen all the rooms in the Wichita cottage, it is time to move to the next floor.

Next time we'll head here which is the fourth floor and I'll finish sharing photos of this museum.  Sadly, I didn't get far on this floor before my batteries died.

Thanks for joining me today in this History Museum.  And please visit Annie and her lovely smiles today.  Feel free to join in with your smile, too.  A smile to start the weekend is always a good thing.

Since next Friday is the second day of the month and I will have a Second on the 2nd to share, I will miss Friday Smiles, but will stop by to say hello to all the Friday Smilers.